What Makes a Woman Cry?

The answer can be quite simple when it refers to a normal, average woman but when it refers to Ali, it's not. Things that make Ali cry are things like Totoro or anything by Studio Ghibli. And when her dog came back home. Not when it ran away the other day, but when the myopic, ill-mannered tick resort managed to find it's way home again she cried.

I don't think I cried when my mum sent my puppy to the pound. I got angry and demanded that my mum give me five bucks, the original cost of the puppy that she actually paid for in the first place. I think I even got another five bucks a few years later when I claimed she never paid me in the first place.

It's not even Ali's stupid dog. It's her sister's dog, but when it started to behave more like a dog and less like a puppy, the sister gave up on it. Ali, her parents and Genya Number Two have taken care of the dog the whole time so I suppose there might be some sort of emotional attachment. For all I know, she's bringing the dog with her when she gets her green card. It's actually a good dog, it just doesn't know better. If I liked dogs and they could wash themselves, it's the type of dog I would want.

Anyway, I just thought it was strange that she cried after he came back, not when he left in the first place. I got a free pass to go see The Heartbreak Kid on Thursday, and as usual I'm gonna take Randy. Maybe it'll give him something to consider about his own marriage. Actually, if he's in Cuba getting married and I'm in Cuba making sure he gets married then who will look after his cat? These are the questions that keep me awake at night. That, and when will that rash clear up?

The Heartbreak Kid stars Ben Stiller, Jerry Stiller, joke stealer Carlos Mencia and my personal favourite Sean Michaels as himself. It also stars a bunch of other people I don't know, and is directed by brothers Bobby and Peter Farrelly. This pair usually do zany movies that are good for a cheap laugh, but I'm hoping for a little more with Ben Stiller. We'll see how it goes.

After going over and over Ali's arrival plans, I recently discovered that her mum will be staying for a week only, and for four of those days, she's booked herself a room at the St. Regis using my credit card. Now I remember what she said at the wedding. I thought it was a welcome, I guess it was more of a warning: "You marry my daughter, you marry my family". So she got what she wanted - a son and a (much) better vantage point to shop from in Midtown. I'm so trusting. Less than a month away... I can't wait! Foxy is so cute.